Casualties of War
by abovethenightsky
Summary: AU, spoilers to R2 17. The war with Britannia finally won, Lelouch must confront some unexpected consequences, and deal with his worst adversary yet - himself. Suzaku, reluctantly alive, faces his past. Lelouch and Suzaku centric, pairings inside.
1. Chapter 1

**1 - Closure**

_It was worth it_.

Lelouch Lamperouge—Lelouch vi _Britannia_—could think nothing else as he watched the light leave his father's eyes for the very last time. He smiled. God, how he smiled. All of the sacrifices, all the pawns that he'd lost…they didn't matter now. He had won. He had _won_.

He dropped down on one knee and closed his eyes. Breathe in, breathe out. He shook. He wasn't quite sure if he'd ever stop shaking. Not now. Bowing his head in mock reverence, he drew in a deep breath and addressed the Emperor's body.

"In the end, Father, you learned the truth. Ironic, isn't it? The ultimate truth—so-called 'honest' means will get you nowhere. And I proved it, didn't I? The Black Prince, the forgotten son. I've learned from your mistakes, your fallacies. To get anywhere, you never let your true face show. The best way to change the world…" He reached for his helmet, cradling it in his right palm.

"…is to wear a mask."

Lelouch threw back his head and laughed. He laughed and laughed and had to brace himself on the floor to keep from collapsing. The strangest feeling, the ultimate fulfillment of all his goals, weighed down on his shoulders, overwhelmed him.

It was then, right then, that Lelouch grew just a little more insane.

When the laughter subsided, he took his father's right hand in both of his own. The palm was blank, and surprisingly cool. "The truth about Mother won't leave this room," Lelouch vowed. "Believe me." He suppressed another laugh, one which would seal the promise, and stood, grinning madly at his father, who, unlike Lelouch, would not see another sunrise.

Replacing his mask, Zero turned on his heels and left the palace without looking back.

--

They recovered Suzaku's body from the wreckage of the Lancelot. He and Kallen, ever violently determined, ever hopelessly persistent, had refused to stop fighting until one of them was taken down, resulting in the virtual destruction of both the Lancelot Albion and the Guren Ganesha's Eight Extremeties-Type. As Lakshata, from a nearby ship, frowned at the mess and schemed up ways repair the damage, Kallen freed herself from the Guren's cockpit to survey the battlefield for herself.

The Imperial city of Pendragon might as well have been a ghost town, for all that was left of it. Most of the palace had been destroyed in the battle, half of the city lay in ruins, scattered across the valley. Survivors from both the United Federation and the Britannian Empire wandered aimlessly through the crumbling towers, salvaging what they could, tending to the wounded. Now the conflict was over. Now was the time for rebuilding.

Kallen smiled. _This_ was sweet revenge. For her brother, for her country…the Britannians had had this coming to them for a long time, and she was glad.

"Something funny, Q1?"

She turned. Zero stood next to her. She hadn't even heard him approach, and yet, there he was, silhouetted in front of a spectacular sunrise. Best piece of symbolism she'd ever seen. Diethard Reid would be proud.

"I just…" She shrugged. "Closure."

"Yes, I understand." He looked directly at her, and for the briefest of moments she thought she could see Lelouch under the mask. "You've made it out alright, I see."

"I got lucky."

"Luck had nothing do to with it," Zero said, and she was proud to hear the admiration in his voice. "It took a skilled pilot to bring down the Lancelot. Only you could have done that. The ace of the Black Knights."

"Yeah." She choked out a laugh. "He's dead, the bastard. I killed him before he could use that monster that Nina made, that 'Freya.' He would have...he'd destroy everything, and I killed—"

"Are you sure?"

The severity of the question shocked her, and she looked at him quizzically. "Ye-yes. There's no way he could have…"

"I need to see this for myself," said Zero. "Closure." Without another word, he strode off towards the destroyed Knightmares, forever locked in battle, intending to leave Kallen on the ledge.

"Wait!" she cried. He didn't seem to have heard her, didn't even slow, and, somehow, Kallen knew that it was Lelouch, not Zero, who needed to confirm Suzaku's death. She ran after him.

When they reached the Lancelot, Kallen was surprised to see three or four medics clustered around the cockpit. One of them heard them coming and called over his shoulder, "Lord Zero, I—you need to—he's—"

Zero pushed them out of the way and knelt on the Knightmare's shoulders, looking into the damaged cockpit. Kallen stood next to him, peering over his shoulder. Surely there was no way…

"Impossible," she breathed.

Suzaku appeared to be unconscious, but largely unharmed. His body bore some scrapes and burns and bruises, but nothing too terrible, yet the cockpit was a blackened ruin around him, all smoking metal and melted plastic. There was no way…he couldn't have _survived_ the blast, and yet the steady rise and fall of his chest proved otherwise. Kallen felt as if someone had punched her in the gut.

"Get him out," Zero snapped.

The medics obliged, lifting Suzaku up with the utmost care—Kallen almost wanted to scream at them to be rough with him, he was _one of them_, but she knew that wouldn't be fair, that everyone was being treated equally now. Somehow, that didn't matter. Hell, even if he _did_ live, she wasn't about to forgive him, not with all he'd done. She didn't think she ever would. Bitterly, she hoped for grievous internal injuries.

As they started to carry him away to a stretcher, he began to stir. Well, good. He had some explaining to do. Kallen watched with her arms crossed as his head rocked back and forth, and his arms and legs thrashed aimlessly. He looked as if he were having a nightmare.

"No," he was saying, "I—I never—I didn't…didn't betray…not again, not—not now." He tried to turn over, but the medics' grips were too firm. "No, she's safe, Nunally's safe, I…I promised." Quieting down a little, he seemed to settle back down. "I promised you, Euphie. I…promised, Lelouch."

Silence.

"He's delirious," Zero said shortly. "Get him treatment, but make sure he's restrained. He's still a danger." He turned to her. "Q1, assist with the cleanup. I have…other matters to attend to."

"Yes, my Lord," the medics chorused, and Kallen nodded, still a little disheartened at Suzaku's apparent ability to survive. Glancing from the medics, retreating rapidly with Suzaku's form limp in their arms, to Zero, stalking off to the command center, she wondered if this wasn't the day that Lelouch Lamperouge died, and Zero took over.

Then she realized it didn't matter, and went to follow her orders.

--

_In the light, he saw Euphemia._

_Her hair fanned out behind her and down her shoulders, and she had angel's wings, white and feathery, spreading wide from her back. She wore a garland of flowers around her neck and a brilliant smile on her face. Her feet were bare. She might have been a saint in a stained glass window._

_She was even more beautiful than he remembered._

_Her blue eyes widened a little as he approached, and, smile unfaltering, she took a step back. "Hello, Suzaku."_

_"Euphie," he gasped. "I…I've waited so long, I…"_

_She held up a slim, pale finger. "Not now," she said. "It isn't time yet."_

_"What?" He looked down. He was still wearing his Lancelot uniform, but he appeared to be unharmed. He felt more alive than he had in recent memory. Strangest of all, it appeared that he was standing in open air. Surely that's what it was like in the afterlife? "No, I should be dead. I finally…Kallen killed me, didn't she?"_

_Euphemia sighed. "She should have. But there's still something inside of you, some kind of will to live." She laughed. "It's kept you alive, all of this time. It's still keeping you alive."_

_His fist clenched. "Lelouch."_

_"Don't blame my brother," Euphemia said with a small, forced smile. "He always…he meant well, through his own means, and now things will begin to go back to the way they're supposed to be. You need to make sure they do."_

_He turned his face away from her. She was too bright, too brilliant. "He won't listen to me," he said softly. "He thinks I betrayed him, but I didn't. I told him, I promised that I would protect Nunally."_

_"And you did."_

_"The only thing I've done right," he mused. "Euphie…"_

_She approached him then, finally. Her fingertips brushed his cheek, and she looked at him, sad and happy all at once. "You need to stay. Protect Lelouch. He's not in physical danger, not anymore, but he will lose himself if he continues…please. Help him. For everyone's sake."_

_"Don't leave," he begged. "Please, stay with me."_

_She kissed him on the forehead. "Trust your heart."_

_He closed his eyes and fell again._

--

**_A/N:_ **Code Geass_. Dear me. I love this anime so much right now it isn't even funny. I put_ Friendly Fire, _the _Death Note_ story,_ _on hold for this, which wasn't really fair, but it's just where my mind happens to be at the moment. With all the action and relationship dyamics of_ Code Geass_, can you blame me?_

_So…is this a speculative ending? Not really. In fact, the events in this story are probably won't reflect what will happen in the series (too many people are still alive), but playing around with the situations and characters is just too much fun to give up. I feel like I may be taking liberties in the initial setup of the series._

_The real question – pairings? Well, I'd tell you if I knew. Surely this will be Suzaku and Lelouch centric, but I don't know if they "end up together" or what at this point. Also, Lelouch with someone else is not out of the question at all._

_This chapter set up a lot of things I'd hope to follow up on. Hopefully, there's some interest. Reviews, especially critiques, are always greatly appreciated._

_D_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N:** Second chapter, woohoo! Also, reviews, woohoo! Thanks so much to **YaanKarasu, Jessica, warrensdarklust, Kitsuki,** and **Naome 666** for reviewing. Many thanks as well to everyone who faved or story alerted. I'm so glad there's interest. I love Code Geass (have I mentioned that lately?), and Suzaku and Lelouch are my special faves, as is C.C., who, still sans memories, makes her first appearance here. This story has me so excited! _

_That said, I'm going away to California (!) on Monday for about a week, and probably won't have a chance to update until I'm back. I'll try to get around to it as soon as I can, though. (School starts soon. /)_

_Enjoy this chapter, and don't be afraid to drop me a review! I love hearing from you guys._

_D_

_P.S. Still not sure if this is going to be slash. I'll keep you posted._

--

**2**

Suzaku Kururugi opened his eyes, but could not see.

After the initial surge of panic that the darkness sparked, he allowed himself to relax and get a feel for his surroundings. It was difficult to do without sight, but he focused as well as he could. He was lying on his back, and the air around him was fresh and cool—he was no longer in the Lancelot, that was certain. He checked his body next, wiggling his toes, then his fingers, and trying to move his legs, only to meet with sudden resistance. A cuff. Trying to work his arms yielded the same result.

So. A prisoner. Of the United Federation, no doubt. And, now that Suzaku could think clearly, he felt the blindfold covering his eyes and sighed, relieved. Not actually blind, then. Thank goodness.

But what did all this mean? Had Zero won? Or was Suzaku simply a hostage, a bargaining chip, to be brought out when the time was right?

And Euphie had said…

"Where am I?" he wondered aloud, not expecting a reply.

"A cell on the _Ikaruga_," said someone to his left.

Suzaku tensed. He knew that voice. "Lelouch."

"You were out for three days, Kururugi," Lelouch continued, as if Suzaku had said nothing at all. "Ordinarily, we would still have you in a medical unit, but, given the circumstances, I authorized your transfer two days ago."

"You'd have let me die in a prison cell?"

"No, we've been monitoring your vitals quite closely. There was never any danger of you dying." Suzaku swore he heard Lelouch chuckle at that. "No danger at all. You should be experiencing temporary weakness, but I've been assured that you will regain your strength. In time."

Suzaku wanted the damn blindfold off. He turned his head in the direction of Lelouch's voice. "So why go to all of the effort?" he asked. "Keeping me alive. It would have been easier…"

"It took very little effort," Lelouch said calmly. "Besides, I wanted to hear your excuse."

"Excuse?"

"Why you betrayed me at Kururugi Temple."

Suzaku was silent. He'd known what Lelouch had thought after that confrontation, but he hadn't expected the ache that came along with the accusation. He drew in a deep breath. "I didn't," he said. "Schneizel, he knew about you, he had me followed. I wouldn't…I didn't betray you. Not that time."

"Do you _really_ expect me to believe that?" Lelouch asked.

"I don't." Suzaku leaned his head back against the table. "But it's the truth." He paused. "Why do you think Kallen was able to catch up to me in the battle? You _knew_ the Emperor was using Nunally as bait, you _knew_…I got her out of the palace before _your_ Black Knights came and destroyed it." He closed his eyes, not that Lelouch could see. "Unlike some people, I uphold my promises."

Lelouch, leader of the rebellion, said nothing.

"Why am I still alive, Lelouch?" Suzaku asked softly.

"_Don't_—" Lelouch began, then thought better of it, and Suzaku wondered, vaguely, if he were going to ask not to be called "Lelouch." "You're _alive_, Kururugi, for the same reason we've left the other Knights of Rounds alive. You have a choice. Swear your allegiance to the Black Knights, and your life will be spared."

"That isn't what I meant." Suzaku lowered his voice even further. "I should be dead. I should have been killed. The Guren's systems should have fried-"

"Think it over," Lelouch snapped, ignoring him. Suzaku heard him stand, his boots—Zero's boots—pressing into the floor. "But if you take too long, there won't be another option." He took a few steps, and then paused. "The Britannian army has been destroyed, so don't think anyone will be charging in here to rescue you."

Lelouch laughed, a cold, manic sound that could only come from Zero. It made Suzaku shiver, and his mouth tightened into a thin line as he heard the door hiss shut. Just what had he done to deserve all of this? Lelouch still hated him, the war, apparently, was lost to the terrorists, and he was a prisoner. Maybe his execution had already been scheduled. _How_ they'd kill him, though, was still...

"Euphie…" he murmured.

And, as an unbidden response, he heard those same three words:

_Trust your heart_.

--

"So? What did he say?"

Lelouch slumped down in a chair. He wasn't sure he wanted to deal with Kallen right now, but she'd all but trapped him in his room and wasn't giving him much of a choice. He removed his mask and set it on his desk. "He said he didn't betray me. What else was he going to say?"

Kallen stood in front of the door, her arms crossed, fierce and oddly imposing in her uniform. "You aren't going to believe that, are you?"

Lelouch ran a hand through his hair, then tilted his head to the side and rested his cheek on his palm. "I can't," he said.

"Good." Kallen nodded. "Little rat. He's probably just trying to get your sympathy, so you won't—"

"Although, he saved Nunally," Lelouch said. "Did you know that?"

Kallen opened her mouth, then hung her head. Looking away from Lelouch, she said, "I saw him. I saw him flying away from the palace. I followed him, to sneak up on him, and I saw her. I thought…I don't know what I thought. I thought he might be kidnapping her. But I watched, and I saw him set her down, and then…then I attacked." She shook her head, as if to clear it. "But what does that matter? A man does one good thing, it can't make up for a thousand other crimes!"

Lelouch folded his hands in his lap and crossed his leg. "Kallen, I know your grudge against Suzaku Kururugi is personal, but I want you to answer me honestly. What would you do?"

Still refusing to look him in the eye, Kallen said, "If I were in _Zero's_ place, I wouldn't even be having this debate. I would kill him." She pressed a button, and the door slid open. As she turned to leave, she stopped in the doorframe. "Perhaps my grudge against Kururugi isn't the only _personal_ factor here," she added coldly.

Zero said, "You're wrong," and meant it, and laughed, but Lelouch said nothing, because he knew she was right.

--

_"_I_ think you should kill him."_

_"I know what you think, Rolo."_

_"I think he should have died a long time ago, Brother. I think you're making too much of this."_

_"I owe him. For Nunally. He saved her, like I asked."_

_"You're trying to save him! You're still trying to save him. But you shouldn't. He wouldn't do the same for you. Didn't he sell you out? Can't you tell the difference between your real friends and—"_

_"_Rolo._"_

_"You should have let me kill him when I had the chance. We wouldn't be having this debate, Brother."_

_"This 'debate' is over, and I'm not your brother."_

_"You're the only family I've ever had."_

_"Rolo, leave me alone."_

_"Whatever you say, Broth-Lelouch."_

--

The girl called C.C. stood by the door of her master's room, waiting for him to call her. This had become a habit of hers, waiting. Master Lelouch, or Zero, or whatever his name was (because it wasn't _her_ business, what he called himself) didn't _like_ to ask for her to come to him, for reasons unknown, so she'd taken to waiting for him, and entering during his quieter moments. He had a temper sometimes, but he could be gentle, too.

She heard his voice, though, and thought he might be asking for her. She was about to turn the knob when she remembered. _Knock._ He'd said—Master had said—she could come in whenever she wanted as long as she knocked. Gingerly, she raised a fist and tapped on the door. Too lightly, he couldn't possibly hear that. She tried again.

"Yes," said Master irritably. "Who is it?"

Oh _no_. This was bad; she'd caught him in one of the wrong moods. Shrinking away from the door, her first instinct was to retreat, but she couldn't, not now—he'd be annoyed with her. "It's C.C., Master," she said softly.

She heard a sigh, and then a reluctant, "Come in."

C.C., who still jumped at the sudden hiss of the automatic door, gingerly stepped inside the room. Her Master sat at his desk with his head in his hands, fingers digging into his scalp. His mask, which had so alarmed C.C. when she'd seen it on his face, law on the desk, harmless and momentarily abandoned. Feeling awkward, as if she'd intruded on some private conversation or personal debate, she clasped her hands together and shifted her weight nervously from foot to foot.

Without looking up at her, Master barked, "Well, what do you want?"

"I, um," she began. Master had told her she could speak as much as she wished, and he would not reprimand her, but that concept was still a foreign one. "I heard your voice, and I—I thought you might need something." She paused, then added, "Master," belatedly, cringing.

"You don't have to do that," Master said wearily. "And I'm fine, C.C. I don't need anything."

"Oh, well." She stood there awkwardly for a moment, and then, mustering her courage, said, "Master?"

"Yes?"

He sounded so tense that her fleeting courage drained as quickly as it had come. "I—I was just wondering if we'd be staying here very long," she stammered. "We never stay anywhere very long, so I was-I was wondering."

Considering her question, Master looked up at her and leaned his face on his hand. He looked a little calmer than before, a little more pensive, and C.C. was glad. "We will be here for some time," he said. "It only makes sense to use the capital of the old Britannian Empire as our new base of operations—the people need some sort of leader right now. Besides, there's reconstruction work to be done. You've seen the palace." She nodded. "And I must deal accordingly with the remainder of the Imperial family. We've captured Schneizel and a few of the others, but that isn't enough." C.C. saw his right hand clench into a fist. "Do you understand that, C.C.?"

Ashamed of her ignorance, C.C. shook her head.

Master closed his eyes. "No. Alright. Well, you and I will probably have to stay here for months, if not years."

"Together?"

He gave her a strange look. "Unless you have somewhere else to go, we're in this together. Does that answer your question?"

Bowing her head, she said, "Yes, Master, thank you," and backed out of his room.

_Together. In this together._

Walking down the hallway, she was suddenly stuck by an odd memory: standing in a room she'd never seen before, pointing a gun at her master, telling him that she couldn't let him die. She stopped and rubbed at her forehead—what an odd thing to think!—and kept walking, glancing about to make sure she still knew where she was. She had the strangest feeling that it had actually happened, and that there'd been a time when she shared that room with her master, and addressed him as an equal. As "Lelouch."

C.C. shook her head, but couldn't completely shake the feeling that there were parts of her life that weren't entirely her own.

--

_"Lelouch!"_

_Gasping and panting, Lelouch fell to his knees, bracing his palms on the rough stone steps leading up to Kururugi temple. All around him the sun was too bright, the cicadas too loud, the air too thin. He felt as if he were going to throw up._

_"Lelouch!" Suzaku called, a few steps ahead. He carried Nunally on his back as if she were no trouble to him at all, as if the steps themselves were no trouble at all. "Are you alright?"_

_"I'm—"_

_"What's wrong with my brother, Suzaku?" Nunally asked, her voice clear and musical. "What's he doing?"_

_"Racing—you this far—was—a bad idea," Lelouch panted. He pressed his hand to his forehead, and took a deep breath. Colors swam before his eyes, and he groaned, before he remembered that he had to be strong for his sister. "Don't worry about me, Nunally, I'm just a little winded. You and Suzaku go up; I'll be there in a minute."_

_"Are you sure?" Suzaku asked, concern written clearly on his face. "We can wait." He shifted Nunally up a little and she giggled. Over Suzaku's dark hands, her pale legs dangled uselessly. _

_Lelouch, for his part, felt guilty and terribly weak. "No, no, don't let me hold you up. Go on, go!"_

_Suzaku blinked, shrugged, then turned and continued on, and Lelouch turned around so he didn't have to see how easily his friend mastered the stairs, carrying Lelouch's little sister to boot. They'd been racing around for awhile now, and this uphill climb was the final stretch. Lelouch never should have agreed to this in the first place, even if Suzaku had said that he'd carry Nunally to make it fairer. He stared down the mountain, at all the paths they'd traveled in the last hour, and wondered why they couldn't have just played chess instead. He always beat Suzaku at chess._

"_Hey."_

_Lelouch looked up. Suzaku was standing next to him, holding out his hand. "Are you sure you don't need help, Lelouch?"_

"_Where's Nunally?"_

_Suzaku jerked his head. "At the top. Waiting for us. Come on, I'll help you up."_

"_I don't _need—_" Before Lelouch could finish the protest, Suzaku had grabbed his wrists and pulled him to his feet. He felt sheepish. "Thanks. You could have just left me, you know. I'd be fine."_

"_What are friends for?" Suzaku grinned, still holding one of Lelouch's hands. Lelouch hadn't really ever realized how warm Suzaku was. _Friends. _"Let's go. We'll call it a tie today."_

_The Britannian prince and the Prime Minister's son climbed the stairs together that day. __The next time Lelouch played chess with Suzaku, he took care to arrange a stalemate._

_--_

What are friends for?

--

_**P.P.S. from the author:** So, there's something about Suzaku still being alive, eh? And will C.C. ever recover? Will Lelouch eliminate the Imperial family? And will Lelouch ever outrun Suzaku? (Kidding, I think we all know the answer to that). That, and more, in future chapters!_

_:)_


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N:** Honey, I'm home! California was lovely, and I was so happy to see all of the reviews, alerts, and faves I got while I was gone. Thanks **Raigon, Himig, AznAnimeChick, FlareKnight, WithABunny, shinobusuraj, blood lust 43110, Suruma, A, Game And Watch, YaanKarasu,** and **KuroDarkness **for your reviews!_

_Couple of shout outs: one to **FlareKnight**, for picking up on how Lelouch should be careful about the discussion of "brother" with Rolo (his carelessness was intentional), one to **WithABunny**, who is awesome, and one to everyone who likes C.C. I like C.C. Also, thanks **Game And Watch**: I'll try to be a little more careful with Kallen next time I write her in, although I do like her just fine. :)_

_Weren't 18 and 19 cool? R2 didn't seem nearly as good as the first season to me, and then BAM! ROLO! NUNNALLY! Somebody set up us the bomb! I'm enjoying this little turn of events, even if the Internet spoiled it for me._

_Suzaku's going insane, too. This should be fun._

_Much love,_

_D_

_P.S. Pairings are going on the backburner for now; I might make them the subject of my next poll. My current one's about the previous two R2 episodes, and, as such, will be obsolete by Sunday. Stay tuned._

**

* * *

**

3

"Ah, Zero." The former Second Prince, Schneizel el Britannia, reclined in his chair, crossing one leg over the other and smiling. Looking casual would infuriate his captor. "To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?"

Zero—who Schneizel knew to be his younger half-brother, Lelouch vi Britannia—motioned to his guards, who set out a table and another chair in front of him. Schneizel barely batted an eye when he saw the chess game waiting to be set up. How amusing. After all this time, it was still a just game.

"I thought I might relieve some of your boredom," Zero said, setting into the chair and mimicking Schneizel's posture. "There are a few hours left until your execution. More than enough time for a simple game of chess."

Schneizel shook his head. Lelouch was more like him than anyone would ever know. Had he caught Zero-and he would have, too, if not for the disarming of FLEIJA-he would have done the very same, playing chess with Lelouch just before watching him face the firing squad. Assuming, of course, that Lelouch could not be persuaded to see reason, and join him.

Zero dismissed the guards; apparently, Schneizel was no longer a danger. Once the door had closed behind them, he removed his mask, setting it down on the table in silence. It was interesting: with or without the mask, he was Zero, now, and not Lelouch, but it was difficult to think of him that way when Lelouch's face was on Zero's shoulders, scrutinizing Schneizel's expression. Lelouch began placing the chess pieces, pawn by pawn always so meticulous, centering each one. Schneizel was bemused by this; his little brother hadn't changed a bit. White pieces, naturally, were set in front of him, and black in front of Lelouch.

Schneizel rested his head on his hand, looking bored. "Is this going to be another wager?" he asked, already knowing the answer. "My life if I win?"

"No," Lelouch said shortly. "Just chess."

"How very nostalgic of you. Recapturing your youth?"

"I know better than anyone that the day when I considered you my brother is long gone," Lelouch said. "It's your move."

"Such a temper," Schneizel murmured, moving a pawn two squares forward. "I must say that I'm proud of you, as your brother. You've found a path to the throne that none of us dared to take. Outright warfare."

Lelouch lowered his eyes, focusing on the game. He moved a knight into play. "I never wanted the throne," he said. "I wanted to destroy Britannia, and it had been destroyed, along with its emperor and his foolish plans for Ragnarok. Besides, you would have come along with a_ coup-d'état _sooner or later."

"I'm glad you think so highly of me." Schneizel leaned forward to move a piece and settled back into his seat. "Now that you have the throne, then, _Zero_, what are you planning to do with it?"

"Nothing that concerns you," said Lelouch, offering Schneizel a stiff smile, "as you have only hours left to live."

"Ah. So you don't know."

"I'm going to obliterate the Empire, to create a better world," Lelouch said simply, as if that was an explanation, which it wasn't. Schneizel was disappointed in his lack of a coherent plan—wasn't Zero known for his plans?—and changed the subject.

"This brings back memories," Schneizel said again, trying to provoke Lelouch into admitting something remotely more interesting.

"We've been over this. I'm no longer your brother."

"Then," Schneizel looked at him, smiling, "why are you indulging me?"

Lelouch's mouth tightened into a thin line. "We never finished the game we played in the Chinese Federation, before Tianzi's _intended_ marriage. I wanted closure."

"Yes. Closure." Schneizel captured one of Lelouch's bishops; in between the conversation, their game had been progressing rather smoothly. Lelouch was the only person who Schneizel had deemed a worthy opponent. "I never thanked you for ignoring my _faux pas _in that game. You must have known the checkmate I set up was illegal, even if no one else there did. Of course, you may have ignored it simply for the symbolic value, in which case I applaud you for your theatricality."

"I wasn't about to embarrass you." Lelouch's voice was heavy with sarcasm. "In front of all of your loyal subjects? It was just another example of my restraint, along with not seizing my opportunity to defeat you."

"Like I said at the time, the Emperor would not have hesitated. I suppose that, in the long run, Kururugi wasn't important enough for you to sacrifice your dignity as a terrorist leader." Two could play at sarcasm. Looking for a way to bother Lelouch, Schneizel took a shot in the psychological dark. "That was an interesting wager. Why Kururugi? Why not the Knight of Six or the Knight of Three, who were also present?"

"Kururugi was an extremely capable pilot," Lelouch said smoothly, but his hand wavered as he took his next move. "And my friend. But whatever you're trying to imply is obsolete—you'd know very well that he betrayed me twice. He's scheduled to be executed with you."

"Really. So you're going to punish him by giving him what he wants?"

Lelouch's hand froze on his king, but his face remained unchanged. He moved a pawn instead. "What he wants. You mean death?"

Schneizel pretended not to hear, and reacted only by moving his queen. "Our psychological examinations of Kururugi uncovered some interesting traits. Naturally, as he gained more status, _my _people looked into his background, which involved some, let's say, 'interviews' with members of the previously established Eleven government." He set his elbows on the table and looked at Lelouch. "As his former friend, you are aware that he's been trying to atone for a certain crime for nearly half of his life. I'm sure he'll be thrilled to know that you're granting his wish."

Castling out of a tricky situation, Lelouch set his hands in his lap, staring Schneizel down. "Are you trying to make a point?"

"Only criticizing your lack of forethought," Schneizel said, smiling. "Kururugi isn't really the issue. You've done an admirable job this far with the war, and I do not underestimate your tactical genius, but it's clear that you have the world at your fingertips and no idea what to do with it. You're still very young, _brother_, and you've come far, but there is still much to learn. The UFN and Britannia are standing at your command."

"And you want to teach me how to use them." It was not a question.

"Very good." At last, he could get to the point. It would probably be futile, but he could try, one last time, to save himself. "Think of what a team we would be, Lelouch. We have been. You weren't naïve enough to think you stopped Ragnarok on your own, were you?" Lelouch said nothing. "If you could bring yourself to trust—"

"Trust," Lelouch repeated shortly. He laughed bitterly. "Trust you? I think not. You'd just as soon stab me in the back. You made this offer when our positions were reversed, and I gave you the same answer."

"How disappointing." But true. Schneizel was much more adept at diplomacy, and he'd been planning on manipulating Lelouch's flaws, then, perhaps, revealing the information about his Geass. He sat back. "In that case, I believe we've played to a stalemate. You can't have much more to say."

Lelouch smiled stiffly, reaching for his mask. "You're right. I have nothing more to say to you." He stood, placed the mask on his head, and became Zero again. He stood a little straighter when he was Zero, Schneizel noticed. "Goodbye."

"Goodbye, Lelouch." The guards filed in after Zero left the room, assuming their usual position by the door, and Schneizel closed his eyes, contemplating the end of an era.

--

Suzaku liked his new cell much better than his old one. He had no idea what the point of his transfer was, not at this point, but now he was no longer blindfolded, and, though still restrained, he was sitting instead of lying down. It made him feel a little stronger, gave him a little more power. His body was still recovering from the crash, and his joints were stiff, but he figured it didn't matter much in the long run.

Lelouch would be killing him soon, after all.

He stretched his legs as best he could and wondered if he would be failing Euphie by accepting his execution at the hands of the Black Knights. Probably. But he didn't have a choice, and he didn't see what good he could do for Lelouch, who clearly wouldn't listen to him. It was best, actually, if he died now, for just about everyone involved. He, at least, would feel a bit fulfilled.

"I'm sorry," he said to the air. "I couldn't do as you asked. I didn't know how. He… he doesn't trust me anymore."

_Don't give up_, Euphie's voice urged in his ear.

Suzaku jerked his head to the sound, but there was no one there. Well, that was that. He was going insane. Great. Euphemia was long dead, and hearing her voice again was the sweetest, most painful kind of torture. He'd rather be put out of his misery. Closing his eyes, he sighed, and waited for someone to take him to the executioner.

He opened them again when he heard the hiss of the door, and was surprised to see Lelouch there, in full Zero costume, with his arms crossed. Suzaku said nothing to him, assuming he was about to be informed of his impending death.

Instead, the words out of Lelouch's mouth—"I've decided that you won't be killed today"—sent a chill down Suzaku's spine.

"What?" he asked, panicking. A lifetime of insanity seemed much more likely now. "Why?!"

"Someone reminded me that dying would not be a punishment for you."

"Oh." No lingering grain of compassion, then. Euphie would be disappointed. Suzaku cleared his throat and tried to find a reason that was a little saner. As far as he could tell, getting killed was the only practical option. "Are you sure that it isn't because you wouldn't have been able to kill me?" he asked hesitantly, minding his double negatives. "The Geass would have gotten in the way."

"The Geass can be overridden," Lelouch said, waving his gloved hand as if he were swatting the question away. Suzaku was mildly irritated that his former friend wouldn't say _how_. "But it's an interesting thought," he continued. "Actually, your Geass has worked in unexpected ways. Instead of having you flee the scene when you were facing death at the Guren's hands, it repaired your body, allowing you to 'live on.' I wonder how far that power extends."

"Living on was not my idea." Suzaku looked away. "What are you planning to keep me around for?"

"Perhaps you can find a way to repent that doesn't involve virtual suicide. You're still a useful pilot."

"The war is over," Suzaku pointed out. "You don't need pilots. Unless you're enlisting Knightmares to help you rebuild, in which case the Lancelot won't be of much use to you. It was heavily damaged."

"Fifth generation Knightmare Frames and below are repairing Pendragon. Rakshata is modifying the Guren to better function outside of a battlefield. She plans on turning her attentions to the Lancelot next."

"Wha—Pendragon?" Suzaku looked at Lelouch and furrowed his brow. "I understand the importance of the Britannian capital, but what about Tokyo? What about all the cities damaged in all of the other battles in the past six months?" Something wasn't right here. Lelouch was never this far behind in his planning. "You're sending Knightmares to rebuild them as well, right?"

"Of course."

Somehow, Suzaku wasn't sure he believed him. Perhaps it was the mask. It was easier to read Lelouch when Suzaku could see his face. "Remember when you promised you'd become an ally of justice? Wasn't your goal to create a peaceful war? Even if you aren't thinking of the people in the countries you've used, at least think of Nunnally. She'd want you to—"

"I don't see why I have to answer to you," Lelouch snapped, making Suzaku flinch. "Don't force your morals on me, Kururugi. The Black Knights and former Britannian army are being deployed all over the world in the reconstruction effort."

"Oh." Suzaku felt winded and mildly humbled; maybe Lelouch did have it together after all. "I'm sure Nunnally would be pleased," he added quietly. _And Euphie_.

Lelouch straightened. "Yes." He laughed softly, and turned to leave. "I'm sure she would be."

Suzaku sighed. Euphie's worries seemed unjustified. But Lelouch stopped, then, and looked at Suzaku over his shoulder. "Tell me," he said. "Where is all of this coming from?"

"W-what?"

"You're a prisoner, and likely to remain one. Why are you so concerned with what I do? Who are you to tell me to run the Britannia, the UFN?" He crossed his arms again. "What are you _doing_, Kururugi? You're a soldier, not a leader."

"It seemed like…common sense." "The spirit of your half-sister told me to" did not seem like a suitable answer. Suzaku got the sense that Lelouch was generally frustrated, and maybe not with him. He hadn't seen the other man like this since they were children.

"Common sense." Under the mask, Suzaku could swear Lelouch was smiling. "Of course." And then, so low that Suzaku could barely hear, he said, "I wish you wouldn't interfere, sister," and left the room without any further explanation, leaving his prisoner to gawk at him.

_Perhaps,_ Suzaku thought, _I'm not the only one who's insane_. He sat back, frowning, and wondered what he could do with the life he just discovered he had.

--

_This time, Euphemia was on a beach. The waves lapped up between her bare toes, once, twice, before heading back out to the sea. Suzaku was captivated by how alive she looked, how she seemed to shine in the sunlight. Next to her stood her sister, Cornelia, and, a little farther up, Prince Clovis, though they stared out at the sun rising—or setting?—on the horizon, not seeming to see Suzaku at all. In the distance, Suzaku saw someone else: a brown haired boy in an Ashford uniform, playing with something on a chain._

_Euphie looked at him and smiled. He bowed his head and said, "I guess you wanted to see me again."_

_She blushed. "I wanted to tell you not to give up on my brother. I know he's stubborn. He's always been stubborn."_

_"I know," Suzaku said. He met her eyes and smiled. Sometimes, he forgot that she'd grown up with Lelouch. She must have forgotten that Suzaku had known him as a child as well. "But not in…I guess, his public persona. Zero always seemed much more persistent than the Lelouch I knew. Now that the war's over, shouldn't he be able to abandon that image?"_

_Euphie nodded and looked at her hands. "But he won't."_

_"Is there something wrong?"_

_Another nod._

_"Oh." He paused. "You can't tell me what it is?"_

_She shook her head this time. Her hair was up in a ponytail, pulled away from her face, and it swung behind her. "It's a combination of a few things, really. But you have to find out for yourself. I can't really…well, interfere."_

_"How is this possible?" Suzaku blurted, unable to contain his curiosity. "I can't actually _be_ talking with you, can I? This is a dream." She looked at him with wide eyes, and he coughed. "I'm worried. I've been hearing your voice, and I'm afraid I'm going insane."_

_Euphie's laugh was musical. "Only those with a powerful Geass or a Code can speak with the dead. Usually, the person is on the path to immortality. Don't ask me how it works, I don't know."_

_Suzaku resisted the urge to ask what a Code was and said, "But I don't have a Geass, or a Code, or anything." It would be a relief to ask Lelouch about the Geass part, though, if Lelouch would answer. He seemed to be hearing Euphie's voice, too, or understand that she was talking to Suzaku._

_"Your situation is rather unique," Euphie admitted. "But I can't tell you anything about that, either. Just know that you aren't going insane." _

_"It's a relief."_

_She laughed again, and reached out to touch his face. "Oh, Suzaku. I've missed you."_

_The scene began to fade around the edges. "Wait!" Suzaku cried. The boy up the beach was no longer visible, and Clovis was fading fast. Euphie withdrew her hand and looked alarmed. "Euphie!"_

_"You've been here too long," she said, staring at him and looking scared. "You have to go back. You can't stay."_

_"Wait!"_

_"When you see Lelouch again," she said, "ask him about his family."_

--

_**P.P.S. **Nunnally in the next chapter, yes? I was actually holding off on her until the series tells us more about Anya, because it seems like they could be connected somehow. Or maybe that's just me being all fan speculatey._

_Also potentially on deck: C.C., Rolo, Kallen, more Lelouch being Lelouch, and Gino and Anya. :)_


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N:** Remember how I said I was going to wait until episode 20 to write about Nunnally, and I was going to wait for Anya? Well, there was nothing about Nana, but a HECK of a lot of Anya. I experienced an extreme WHAT THE HELL reaction to that entire episode - not sure if I was alone in that, or not._

_So you can probably guess by now that this story is going to hella diverge from the actual R2 (though I mooched off of what they did with Anya - although it's yet to be explained, I think it's cool). The terms of Suzaku's _Live_ Geass are a little different in this story, and he's obviously not crazy. Also, C.C. getting her memories back, like, now, was unexpected to me. Since the series is in progress, and heading towards the climax, we're obviously going to be seeing more divergences, to which the author of this story will probably say, "Oh, to hell with it. I'm going to do the best I can." It may mean some picking and choosing, so please bear with me._

_Anyway, thanks to **LunaLocket, A, AznAnimeChick, Asami-chan37, Suruma** (who picked up on a good little detail)**, Anonymous, Himig, FlareKnight, **and **WithABunny** for reviews! I know not much happened last time, but I'm glad you guys commented. I love hearing from you._

_FYI to **WithABunny** (to understand the last part of this chapter): Geass is a sort of mind control (usually) that has varying forms. Lelouch has a Geass that allows him to issue commands and have people obey them. When someone is under the effect of a Geass, their eyes sort of turn...pink. Yep. A Knightmare is a giant humanoid fighting thingamabob, and Anya was a Knightmare pilot for the Britannian side._

_As always, I love comments from you guys, and hope you enjoy this chapter!_

_D_

_P.S. The first part of this chapter is not supposed to imply any sort of pairing, just explain, mostly, something about Nunnally's character. Although I did use it to explain, a little, Lelouch's relationship with Euphie (after he kills her in Season 1, at least in the sub I saw, he was all "Goodbye, Euphie. You were my first love." Which never sat right with me. Until now)._

* * *

**4**

_The terrorist Zero has a dead man's memories._

_Zero was born when he stormed away from his father's throne at age nine. Zero grew from protecting Nunnally as he carried her through the fields of Japanese casualties. Zero's resolve strengthened as he saw the pain war caused reflected in the expressive green eyes of his first and only friend, who was trying so desperately not to cry._

_Lelouch Lamperouge would remember the cicadas in the spring in Japan, and the blue, blue summer skies of Britannia. He would remember posing for one of Clovis' portraits, remember chasing Euphemia around the gardens, remember trying to teach little Nunnally how to play chess, remember how rich his mother's voice had been. He would see a proud, spirited Suzaku Kururugi, who was no more than a child but taught young Lelouch so, so much, and understand._

_He would recall the good times. He would remember the games the Imperial siblings played: of adulthood, of bravery, and of marriage._

_Euphie was the closest thing he'd had to a girlfriend back then, at eight—and they were related, of course—but she was so sweet and kind and pretty. Their bond was almost as strong as the one he shared with Nunnally, but not quite there, not yet. Still, he loved to talk to her while she braided little Nana's hair, because she would always smile and listen._

_"You two should get married," said Nunnally, who was too young to know better. "I'd love that."_

_Euphie giggled at that, and Lelouch made a face. Cornelia, the older sister, who was always nearby, said firmly, "They can't get married, Nana."_

_"Of course they can!" Nunnally chirped, standing up and brushing off her skirt. Her violet-petal eyes sparked. "Brother, Euphie, come with me. I'll marry you."_

_Marianne, holding a hastily picked bunch of poppies, was the flower girl, Clovis, who begged to get back to his paintings, the unwilling ring-bearer, Cornelia, humoring her sister, the maid of honor. While Nunnally, her hair freshly braided, improvised some vows—"And you'll love each other forever and ever and ever"—a green-haired girl watched from the shadows of the trees, and sighed._

_Lelouch found the whole thing a little silly, but indulged Nunnally anyway. When he suggested marrying her off next, to Clovis, she politely turned him down, shaking her head and giving him one of her brightest grins._

_Nunnally always liked to play the priest. She liked seeing people together, and happy, and loving. She thought that Lelouch and Euphie, two of her favorite people in the world, deserved to be happy and loving more than anyone else._

_That hazy period after Marianne's death should have been the end of the wedding games. But children were children, and Nunnally grew sad, and restless, with two legs she could no longer use, and two eyes that would no longer see._

_So, a few months into their stay in Japan, Lelouch suggested another mock wedding to cheer her up. He'd _planned_ on officiating, and marrying her to Suzaku. He thought she would have liked that. She liked Suzaku, at least._

_But Nunnally had insisted otherwise, and, the next day, Lelouch found himself married to Suzaku instead, with a makeshift ring of grass on his fourth finger._

_(They'd fought it out almost immediately afterwards, yelling and kicking and scratching—Suzaku won, as always, but that little "lovers' spat" had helped Lelouch feel validated, partially because the stupid ring had fallen off. Marriage was a girly game, and he'd only been though that for Nunnally's sake.)_

_It was alright, though. He endured it, because he adored his sister._

_And Nunnally always liked to play the priest._

--

Nunnally didn't quite know where she was. She couldn't have been far from Pendragon, and yet…here there were flowers, and birds that sang, and fresh air. It was reminiscent of her room in the transport to Japan. She had always loved flowers; they reminded her of her mother's garden. Marianne vi Britannia had filled the world with bright colors and soft petals in the spring. Nunnally could smell flowers now, wherever she was. The birds might have been fake, the air filtered, but the flowers, those were real.

She had to be in a room, though—she knew that from the door that opened, and the boots clacking on a hard floor, whenever _he_ came in to talk to her. Zero.

He was back now, back to check on her, ask her a couple of questions. He said he'd give her anything he wanted, but all she really wanted was information: what had happened to all of her friends? To her family? To her _brother_? But he wasn't about to tell her that.

Instead he said, without a trace of sarcasm, "Are you comfortable?"

"Ah, yes." She had to stop herself from adding the "thank you" which immediately sprang to her lips. Nunnally was a good Britannian girl, but she was, essentially, a prisoner here. Thanking her captor would not be ideal.

Zero was silent, but he hadn't left. He was pacing. His footsteps echoed on the floor. Nunnally stayed perfectly still, wondering, as always, how to react in the terrorist's presence. He was always so charged, so tense, and she was afraid of offending him. Who knew what he might do?

He stopped pacing. "Is there anything else you need?"

Nunnally was about to say "no," but stopped herself. Superficially, there wasn't anything else she needed. She was being well cared for, and a shy, shrinking girl would come in three times a day with her all of her favorite foods. The way the girl's long hair occasionally brushed Nunnally's fingertips reminded her of C.C. But there was something else she wanted, so she put on her best Governor voice and said, "I want to know: what are you planning to do with me, Lord Zero? Why are you keeping me here?"

Zero laughed, but there was a nervous edge in his voice, and Nunnally noticed. "I'm hoping that you'll see reason," he said. "Although they were naïve, I admired your intentions towards the Japanese people. Now that the war is over, I need someone to help me create that peaceful world you idealized."

"Me?" Nunnally gasped, just a little.

"Your motives are pure," Zero said, by way of explanation. "Our cooperation will help me gain the trust of the Britannians, and, therefore, unite what's left of the warring factions. Will you join me?"

Join _him_. Create a peaceful world. Peace and happiness were all Nunnally had ever wanted, for anyone, and yet…she thought of Clovis and his beautiful paintings, of Euphie with her kind ways and brilliant smile, of Cornelia, strong and protective. She thought of all of the nameless, faceless men and women who had died to put Zero where he was today, and shuddered.

She thought of Lelouch, the brother she might never see again. She couldn't ask Zero about Lelouch; he wouldn't know Lelouch existed, and if she told him, then he would go after him, too. Zero wanted the Imperial family dead, with her, apparently, as the only exception. If she waited…maybe if she waited…

Lelouch would rescue her.

Unless…

Nunnally shook her head. "I'm sorry," she said softly. "I can't. Not right now."

Zero did not react, and it scared her. How quiet he was. "I'm sorry," she said again.

"Very well," Zero snapped, turning on his heel. "I'll give you some time to think it over."

He left Nunnally alone with her flowers, in darkness.

--

C.C. was worried about her Master.

This was the second time in three days that she'd found him, slumped outside of that very same door, with his feet planted on the ground, his head bent forward, and his elbows on his knees with his hands hanging between his legs. He was wearing that mask of his, so she couldn't see his face, but she could hear him.

She approached hesitantly, afraid that he'd lash out (even though after the first time, he said he never would). He sounded as if he was crying, but then she realized that he wasn't. He was _laughing_, softly, hysterically. His shoulders shook.

It frightened her. She reached out to touch his arm, wondering if he could see her. He didn't react to her touch, so she asked, "Master? What's wrong?"

Nothing. Just laughter. _Ha ha ha ha ha_.

Maybe nothing was wrong. Maybe something was just terribly funny. C.C. wasn't going to question, and she began to draw back, but—

There had been another time when Lelouch had laughed and laughed and laughed. After a battle in one of those giant machines, the ones that frightened her so much now. This was the one where he'd opened the hatch and discovered…discovered what some C.C., who was not this C.C., had already known for a very long time. The White Knight, the one that Lelouch had been fighting, his greatest obstacle, was his best friend, Suzaku Kururugi. C.C. looked down on him, his Knightmare machine bathed in moonlight, as he laughed and laughed and laughed. That laugh…

That laugh was the sound of a broken heart.

C.C.'s vision flashed green for a moment, and she shook her head. She was here, now. Wherever that was, she wasn't there. She was kneeling by her Master, watching him laugh _here_, not in some other country, after a battle, _here._ But now she knew what his laughter meant.

Gingerly, she reached for his arm again, and when he didn't pull away, she slipped it around his shoulders and tried to push him to his feet. "Master," she said, "You aren't well. I'm going to take you back to your room."

He stopped laughing but didn't acknowledge her, still looking at the ground. He didn't resist as she, stumbling and weak, managed to push him up. He was too thin. She made a mental note to get him to eat a little more.

C.C. didn't look at him as they walked back to his room. Her Master felt warm to her under the smooth fabric of his costume. She wondered if he was getting sick. Just in case, she laid him down on the couch and removed his mask, so he could breathe more easily. He had been sweating, and his hair was damp.

"I'll get you a glass of water, Master," she said softly. "Wait there."

When she returned, glass in hand, he was still staring at the ceiling, his long-lashed violet eyes unblinking. She set the water on a small table and waited for her instructions.

"Don't tell anyone about this, C.C.," was all he said, his voice flat.

"Oh, _no_, Master," she breathed, trembling. She wouldn't dream of it.

He sat up, rubbing his forehead. "Stop looking at me like that," he said. "I'm fine. _Fine_."

"Okay." C.C. became very fascinated with the floor.

She heard her Master sigh. "I have other matters to attend to," he said. "Stay here. No—make sure Nunnally gets lunch, and then stay out of sight."

"Yes, Master."

He left for the bathroom, and she heard water running as he washed his face. She looked at the orange plush doll, slumped on the couch, and sat down next to it. Some things about her Master, C.C. was sure, she would never understand.

--

_"You don't need her. You have me."_

_"Rolo, not now."_

_"I'm just saying. You don't need her. You never needed her. Please, Brother, don't reject me. I'm worth just as much as she is, if you would just give me a—"_

_"You tried to _kill_ her, Rolo! If Jeremiah hadn't been there, and Sayoko hadn't realized, you would have. So don't—don't _beg_ for acceptance. I'm not going to give it to you. Why are you still here?!"_

_"Brother, please."_

_"You _still_ don't understand? I'm not speaking to you, Rolo. I _hate_ you!"_

_"_Brother…_"_

_"I was never your brother. Get away from me, Rolo. I don't want to talk to you. Not now…not ever."_

--

There was always the issue of Nunnally.

Lelouch Lamperouge's blind, beloved little sister. He had taken up the mask of Zero for her, to create a world where she could live happily, so that maybe, one day, when she opened her eyes again, whatever she saw would make her smile. That—and revenge against his father, for his mother, Marianne's, death—had been his motive at the beginning, before his personal vendetta had turned into so much more.

And now…Nunnally didn't want to be a part of that perfect world? Or did she just despise Zero?

Zero.

There was no way that Lelouch could tell Nunnally that he was Zero. At least, not now. Where some had seen Zero as the figurehead of a glorious movement, others, like Suzaku and Nunnally, had seen him as a terrorist. People like that wouldn't believe that the ends justified the means.

To Nunnally, Zero was the murderer of her siblings, the one who started the war. In the long term, she might see the peace after the war, and how much better everything will be with the Empire gone. But at present, he was stuck.

Lelouch was Zero, and he couldn't tell his sister.

He splashed cold water on his face, and tried to snap out of it. He could easily give up the mask of Zero. He had tried, once before. Zero would fade away into the pages of history, and Lelouch could save his sister and live a normal life. Normal…how tempting that was.

But everyone else wouldn't let go of Zero so easily. He remembered how the Black Rebellion had floundered once Zero disappeared. They needed a leader again, now. Someone had to step in where the Britannian Emperor, who had controlled two-thirds of the globe, had left off. Not a new Emperor, but something different. Something more. The newly liberated countries needed some kind of overarching leadership, someone to oversee the repairs, act as a guiding hand, or they would dissolve into chaos, unused to such freedom.

And yet…

Nunnally needed Lelouch. The world needed Zero.

He clutched the edge of the sink, and stared into the mirror. To keep himself from breaking down, maybe he needed Zero, too.

--

Anya Alstreim, still dressed in her Knight of Rounds uniform, wandered the basement of the Ikaruga in a daze. She was looking for something, but didn't know quite what it was, or where, only that it was somewhere. Somewhere here, in the Black Knights' flagship.

Her vision flashed green, then pink, then orange, and she staggered, falling back against the wall. What was she doing? Why was this happening? It was very curious, indeed.

_Don't worry, Anya. Trust me._

Standing, she looked around, but there was no one there. "Strange," she said, expressionless. She blinked once, twice, wondering what she had come here for.

_Let me guide you_.

"Who is that?" she called, but nobody answered her. She shook her head. It would be an inopportune time to go insane—she'd just been freed by the Black Knights, allowed to get back to her Knightmare frame, Mordred, and instead she was wandering around and hearing voices.

Anya took out her diary, to record this strange turn of events, and then stopped. It was as if her hand was acting of its own accord, closing the diary back up. She dropped it and stepped back as it clattered to the ground. "Who are you?" she asked, more to herself than anyone else.

_Don't worry_.

She took a deep breath, and suddenly felt all fear and anxiety drain from her body. She was calm. Unusually so. It was…disarming. She closed her eyes and said, "Understood."

When she opened them, her irises were rimmed in pink.

Anya smiled, and walked down the hallway, glancing to her left, and right, at the doors she passed. There was something up the hall, something noticeably off, something strong. Someone with a Geass? Someone who had been Geassed? Maybe it was Lelouch. Maybe Lelouch was in there.

She pressed a button, and the door opened.

--

Suzaku's head snapped up at the sound. He'd been asleep. He thought he still was. The girl standing there couldn't possibly be… "Anya?"

Anya shook her head, and her eyes widened. She looked at her hand on the doorframe and yanked it back. She didn't appear to know where she was. Suzaku strained forward. What had happened to her?

She was surprised to see him, he could tell that much. Anya rarely let her emotions show, but she seemed genuinely shocked to see Suzaku here, bound and imprisoned. After a second, her face reverted to her normal indifference. She said nothing, looking at the rest of Suzaku's cell with masked interest.

"Anya," Suzaku said again. If she was walking around freely, she must be on the side of the Black Knights, now. Even so. "Anya, it's me. Suzaku."

"Suzaku," Anya repeated, characteristically deadpan. "Where am—" She stopped in the middle of her sentence, her face oddly blank.

"Anya?"

"Sorry," she said. "Wrong door."

She stepped out and closed it behind her, leaving Suzaku to wonder, not for the first time, what the hell was going on.

--

_**P.S.:** The pairings poll is now up on my profile, if you want to sound off. I'm starting to develop a clearer sense of where this plot is going, so I can't promise to fulfill all your wishes, but I'm still interested in what you guys would like._

_Next time: Gino and more Anya, Suzaku, and, ehh...Lelouch, Kallen, and whatever happened to Nina? (Answer: no one cares). See you then!_


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N:** So…I can't make up my mind about R2 21. Whether I liked it or not, whether the explanations were sound, whether the part of me that went "HELLZ YEAH KNIGHT OF ZERO" will be overruled by the part that was annoyed by the timeskip and lack of development (Suzaku: "You killed Euphie." Lelouch: "Uh, so?" And then what? Do we have Suzaku: "To hell with it, man. Good to see you again." Lelouch: "Sweet, let's take over Britannia!" I just…what happened?) But I won't review here. I should join a forum or something._

_Anyway, I used to be worried about throwing out some randomness (or, not randomness, some plot twistiness) in this story, but now that R2 has come up with the current turn of events I'm convinced that anything I might do won't phase you. Unless I turn Lelouch into a cat, and make Arthur the protagonist of the series. Which I won't do._

_With that said, I'm disclaimering RIGHT NOW that there will be obvious modification of some characters' goals (read: Marianya) given the timeline of this story. Who knows? Some of it might actually…make sense. We'll see._

_Thanks **WithABunny, LunaLocket, Himig, asami-chan37, AznAnimeChick, FlareKnight, **and **Suruma** for reviews! You guys are awesome. Reviews let me know how I'm doing, and they're very important to me, so dropping a note is always appreciated._

_In honor of Lelouch on his Imperial throne, I give you...Zero, on his Imperial throne. Have fun,_

_D_

_P.S. Lelouch/Suzaku is leading the pairings poll, followed by C.C./Pizza Hut. Doesn't guarantee any pairing in this story from me, but it does let me know what you want to see, so PLEASE VOTE!_

* * *

**5**

Kallen's place was at Zero's side.

It was something she'd known almost since the beginning. She'd always placed complete trust in him, following his instructions, doing what she was told, risking everything for some plan—and feeling justified in her faith when he led them to victory, again and again and again.

(Of course, there were losses. The failed Black Rebellion was one of those. But over time, people and history favor the victor's victories, and forget about their losses. The overall result matters more.)

The astounding part, to Kallen, was that standing by Zero's side would mean standing by the side of the Britannian throne. She'd _known_ he was Lelouch, _known_ he was a Prince of Britannia, but she didn't know that he would take his plans that far. Despite herself, a small part of her longed to be back in Japan. Her home.

But duty was out, and she was here, now, in a new uniform, by Zero's side as his personal knight. She thought smugly that she'd won out over Kururugi in the end, then—even though they were on opposite sides for the entire war, she swore that the part of Zero that was Lelouch would have wanted Suzaku at his side, instead of her. A small part of her had always felt that way, ever insecure. As if she needed Zero more than he needed her, even though she knew she wasn't just another pawn in his game.

Kallen glanced over at Zero. After all of this, he was still Zero, not Lelouch vi Britannia. He could have legitimized his claim to the throne by revealing his identity as a former heir (known, at this point, by only a few) but hadn't. Instead, he still wore his mask, a symbol of his struggles, his ideals, how much he had overcome.

He was holding a press conference, now. Sitting confidently with his legs crossed and back straight, he proclaimed that the previous day's executions had been "necessary" to creating his new, more benevolent Empire. Among the reporters, Kallen glimpsed Milly near the back of the room, standing by a cameraman with the tiniest frown on her face.

And then it happened.

A reporter—raising his hand—beginning his question and then—

"Long live the Empire!"

_The shot_.

Kallen would easily, _easily_, have taken the bullet for Zero, but it came so fast, she hadn't—

She lunged, but just too late.

Zero crumpled just before she reached him, and she ended up knocking him out of the throne. Kallen felt something wet on his chest, right—oh, _fuck—_where his heart was, and she grabbed his wrist, tearing off his glove, feeling for a pulse, the strange red symbol on his palm not registering. There was only Zero, _Zero_.

(Out of the corner of her eye, almost in slow motion, she saw the guards apprehend the reporter, saw the gun fly into the air. A needle and ceramic gun, to avoid setting off the metal detectors. It shattered into a million tiny fragments on the floor. Everyone backed away, horrified, eyes wide, as if to distance themselves from the murder.)

Kallen pressed her hand to his chest, feeling for a heartbeat. Oh God, _please_—

Jeremiah was suddenly beside her, looking every inch as livid as she felt, his whole body tense, wired, ready to attack. "I'll take him," he said. "Give him to me."

"_No_," Kallen said firmly. She still didn't trust the man; he'd switched over to their side while she was a captive, and she had no idea what his motivations were. She wouldn't trust him with her life; she didn't trust him with _Zero's_. "I'll get him out of here. _I_ will. Get…a doctor."

She closed her eyes, took a breath—no time to lose your head, Kozuki—and picked Zero up. He was taller than her, but so skinny that it was almost easy to lift him. Almost. He was a dead weight in her arms. Too still. Oh _God_…

Stumbling, Kallen took him to the hallway behind the throne room, where he'd be out of sight, before removing his mask. Lelouch was deathly pale. Unconcious. Still breathing? She wasn't sure. The front of his costume was soaked with blood, and her hands came away red when she tried, once again, to feel his heart. Her eyes were far too hot, and she couldn't see…no _crying_, not _now_…but she didn't know if he could make it…Jeremiah had called for a medic, hadn't he?

"I _swear_," she whispered, laying two fingers across his neck to feel his pulse. "If you die on me…"

It seemed as if she was looking at that pale, still face forever before she heard the footsteps behind her. Jeremiah had returned. "How is he?"

"He's—" Something caught in Kallen's throat, and she looked from Jeremiah to Lelouch, unmasked, on the floor, and tried, irrationally, to shield his face. Not that it mattered now. "You can't—you can't _see_ him like this, you…"

"I know his face," Jeremiah said shortly, giving Kallen pause. "Will he live?"

"I…"

Kneeling across from her, Jeremiah undid the front of Lelouch's costume, brushing his cape aside, ripping his shirt, flying through the buttons of his vest. There was so much blood, there was no way that he'd last until the medics got here, but…Kallen didn't see a wound. Blood, but no wound. How was that possible?

"I see," Jeremiah said, sounding relieved, but Kallen didn't see at all, and she wanted to scream at him, barely keeping calm. She was a soldier. She was stronger than this.

A barely perceptible movement caught her eye—Lelouch's right hand, the ungloved one, moved the slightest bit. She stopped looking at Jeremiah and stared, reaching out for Lelouch, and then—

His eyes opened, and he sat up, rubbing at his scalp. He blinked, looking down at himself, at his ruined shirt, and at all of the blood. Then, he smiled, and addressed Jeremiah. "The man who shot me, has he been caught?"

"Yes, my Lord," Jeremiah said. "A Britannian reporter."

"Excellent." Lelouch looked down at himself again, not with wonder, but as if everything had gone according to some plan. As if his miraculous recovery was no miracle. As if he'd been missed entirely, and was just playing dead. He was always one for theatrics. But with no wound, where had the blood come from?

"I don't understand," Kallen said. "You _were_ shot."

"I was," Lelouch agreed. "I don't have time to explain. Jeremiah, are the medics coming?"

"Yes, my Lord."

"Send them away." Jeremiah nodded and left, and Lelouch turned back to Kallen. "You managed to get me out of the throne room, among all of the chaos. That was admirable." He reached behind him and found his mask, putting it back on his head. "What I'd expect from my best knight."

"The next time," Kallen said, "Security will be tripled. I promise. This won't happen again." _You could have died!_

He waved her off. "No need. I'll just go out in an hour or so and let everyone know that I'm perfectly fine. That should deter any assassins, at least for awhile. Diethard can spread the rumor that I'm invulnerable."

"Zero?"

"Yes?"

She had so many questions for him, but she bit them all back and looked away. "I'm…glad you're alright. I guess…" She shrugged. "You had me worried."

Zero laughed. "Don't worry," he said coldly. "It will take a little more than a bullet to kill me."

--

"I saw Suzaku yesterday," Anya said.

Gino Weinberg, former Knight of Three, gave her a strange look. "What? Suzaku? Where?"

Anya snapped a picture of Gino's face. It would make an amusing diary entry. "Somewhere on the _Ikaruga_," she said. "I'm not sure exactly where, but it was definitely Suzaku."

Gino leaned back against the wall, as casual as ever. "What were you doing wandering around the _Ikaruga_?" he asked, obviously intrigued. She couldn't blame him. _She_ didn't know what she was doing on the _Ikaruga_, and she wasn't prepared to tell him what had happened, because, being Gino, he would laugh it off. Or he wouldn't believe the part about Suzaku, that she had seen him, and that was the only part which she was sure of.

Anya shrugged. "I got lost," she replied flatly, looking at her diary. "They had just released me."

"Huh." Gino scratched his chin. "You know that Suzaku's officially listed as 'whereabouts unknown,' right? You saw what happened to the Lancelot."

"I did. I thought he was dead."

"That's probably what they wanted you to think," Gino said. Although he'd agreed to swear loyalty to the Black Knights in order to save his own life, he wasn't keen on Zero, and his Britannian pride made it difficult for him to accept his new role. Anya knew this. So did whoever was in Anya's mind.

"Here's the thing," Gino continued. "Zero doesn't want people to know that Suzaku's alive. He'd probably announce Suzaku officially dead in a few months, right? I mean, if Suzaku's actually a prisoner, he can't appear in public and dispute that. Meanwhile, Zero can keep Suzaku around and do whatever he wants."

"Why would he do that?"

Gino shrugged. "I don't know. But Zero and Suzaku seem to have some kind of weird connection, right? From what I've heard, Suzaku's the only one who knows who Zero really is among the Rounds, except for Bismark, and they haven't caught him yet. Maybe Zero thinks he's a threat, eh?"

"So why not kill him?" Anya was pleased. Or rather, someone else was pleased, and it was spreading to Anya. Gino didn't have much common sense sometimes, but he seemed to be able to piece this together just fine.

"I don't _know_." Gino was still a little bitter, residual from the war. "Maybe they know each other. Look, that doesn't really matter. What matters is that Zero has Suzaku. I don't care much about Zero, but I'm not going to let Suzaku rot in prison."

Anya took another picture of Gino. He was smiling, now, that devilish smile that all of the girls at Ashford seemed to like. "So?" she asked, already knowing the answer.

"So we're going to get him out," said Gino, sounding happier than he'd been since Zero won the war.

Inside Anya's mind, a little voice said, _Perfect._

--

_She'd gotten out._

_She didn't know how, but she'd gotten out, out of the room, off of the ship, and the outside world was terrifying. Giant man-machines flew in the sky, firing bolts and blasts, and the wind they created whipped her long hair about her head, sent grit and dirt flying into her face._

_She was terrified._

_She wasn't the only one. All around her people were running, running, screaming, mothers with children, children alone, husbands searching for wives, everyone trying to get out of the way of the great flying things which were tearing the world apart._

_Everyone except._

_A girl who she didn't know, with dark hair and big glasses, stared up at the machines. There, where a big white one fighting a big red one, so quickly that she could barely follow them with her eyes. Her mind was screaming at her to run away. She wanted to shrink away from them, the giant fighting machines, but there was that girl—_

_"Fire it!" the girl was screaming, desperately, hopelessly, as if they could hear her all the way up there. "Fire it, Suzaku!"_

_A glance at the girl's eyes told her that the girl must be mad. She backed away, cowering. A battle like this was no place for her. Glancing about frantically, she saw something that looked like the ship she came from, and ran for it. Master. She needed to find Master._

_Behind her, one of the machines fell from the sky. It fell as she ran away, hopelessly, burning like a shooting star. The girl didn't see it. She wouldn't have run, anyhow._

_"Fire it, Suzaku!"_

CRASH.

_She closed her eyes and kept running. Master. She needed to—_

--

"C.C."

Lelouch watched at the girl sat upright on the couch, blinking. She pulled her knees to her chest and stuttered, "D-do you n-need something, Master?"

"You were calling for me," Lelouch said, surveying her coldly. She'd been having these nightmares ever since the Battle for Pendragon. Kallen had found her, wandering around the battlefield, shell-shocked, and promptly returned her to Lelouch, albiet puzzled by the new C.C.'s behavior. He'd had no idea what she was doing out there, but she was so exhausted and relieved that she promptly fell asleep, and, upon waking, didn't mention the incident again.

C.C. seemed mortified. "I was?"

"Yes."

"Oh…" She buried her face in her knees. "It was nothing. It was nothing."

"It was a nightmare."

C.C. trembled.

Lelouch leaned on the edge of the couch. "There's no shame in a nightmare," he explained, not really looking at her. "A subconscious manifestation of our anxieties or fears. Recognize it for what it is, and know that it holds no sway in the real world."

"Yes, Master."

"If that's all it was," Lelouch said, "then I'm going back to bed."

"Master?"

He stopped and turned around to look at her. "Unless you need something else."

C.C. said nothing, just stared at the floor, and Lelouch sighed. He thought he might know what she wanted. Nunnally had asked him for something similar, a lifetime ago. Comfort. She was so harmless, so weak, so much like Nunnally had been, just after a nightmare. What had he done then? Could he possibly still do it now?

Maybe...he would try.

He crossed back to her and sat down on the couch. This felt so unfamiliar. He closed his eyes, and took her warm hand in both of his, ignoring her surprise. This _degree_ of humanity would take a little time to get used to, for both of them. He braced himself.

"Master?" she whispered.

"Go to sleep, C.C.," he said, perhaps a little too firmly, but she didn't seem to mind, and stretched back out on the couch, her long, green hair fanning out behind her.

"Thank you," he heard her whisper. "No one has ever…no one has ever…"

Lelouch watched her sadly. The moment she drifted back to sleep, he released her hand and started walking back into his room. Humanity. Was he not more than human, now? He studied the Geass sigil on his palm, contemplating its meaning. Immortality. He'd survived a bullet to the heart. Was that not more than human?

Then again, closeness. Comfort. Companionship. Compassion. The fact that he had to force himself to hold C.C.'s hand and not flinch away, that he was lying to his sister, that he was holding his friend prisoner, was that not _less_ than human?

But then, had Lelouch ever been human? Had Zero?

Did it matter?

--

_**P.P.S.** So in case it wasn't clear, the italics section this time was C.C.'s dream. Poor C.C. And that crazy girl in the dream was Nina. Without having FLEIJA or whatever ever fired, she's pretty much back to where she was in 18 - desperate for it to _be_. To a fault. RIP, crazy girl._

_Anyway, next time...we are breaking Suzaku out! ...maybe._

_Check out the pairings poll if you haven't yet. Happy Labor Day!_


	6. Chapter 6

**6 – Attempt**

_Euphemia was running. They were nowhere, now, nowhere recognizable, suspended in the middle of the air, everything around them blinding white. And she was flying towards him, her long, light hair streaming behind her, her eyes wide with alarm. Suzaku had never seen her look like that before. Never._

_"Wha-what's wrong?" he asked, taken aback._

_She ran right into him. It was the first time she'd ever touched him in this dream world. He thought he could _feel_ her fingers as they gripped his arms, her head as she buried it in his chest. His heart pounded with a fever that almost seemed real. Maybe it was real. He'd known for awhile that these were no ordinary dreams._

_"Please," she whispered into his shirt. "Please, you can't—you _can't_—"_

_Suzaku stroked her soft, soft hair gently, puzzled. He would have been content just to hold her, but he wasn't going to let her franticness go unexplained. "I can't what?" he asked softly._

_"You can't—oh." Euphie glanced behind her. "What…?"_

_Suzaku looked over her head and saw that someone else was walking towards them, walking on nothing. That boy…the one in the Ashford uniform, from the beach, in one of his other dreams. Suzaku remembered his name with a jolt in the pit of his stomach. Of course. Of _course.

"_You can see him?" Euphie asked._

_Rolo ignored her question and addressed Suzaku directly. "Please," he said. "Please tell my brother…tell him not to hate me. Please." He looked down at the locket in his hand. It glittered, reflecting the light that glared around them._

_"I—"_

_"Suzaku…" Euphie reached up to touch his face, her eyes full of concern. "You can't leave, do you see? You can't. There's too much to be done."_

_This didn't answer any of the questions in his mind. "Leave where? Here?" That was perfectly fine. Being with Euphie forever…_

_He squeezed her a little closer, but she shook her head. "Not here. You can't stay here. Listen, you can't—"_

_"Euphie!" Rolo cried. "He's disappearing!"_

_Euphie pulled back and looked at him. Suzaku looked down at himself. He seemed perfectly fine, completely intact, but Euphie and Rolo were staring at him with horror. "What's going on? Euphie!"_

_"No." Euphemia shook her head. "No. It's for the best. No."_

_His vision began to cloud over. The last things he heard were Rolo's frantic "Tell him I'm sorry!" overlapping with Euphiemia's frenzied, "Suzaku, you can't—"_

--

Kallen entered Lelouch's room without knocking, without permission. She couldn't help it. She was angry with him. She thought that the frustration would magically dispel if she let it sit for a day, but it had only changed, growing into a small fire at the pit of her belly, and it wouldn't leave her alone. She wanted answers, and "no" wouldn't suffice.

She expected Lelouch to be in sight when she walked in, but there was only C.C., asleep on the couch. It was still difficult for Kallen to equate this new, meek C.C. with the sarcastic, enigmatic one she knew. Shock from the battle, Lelouch said, had caused the amnesia, but the C.C. Kallen knew couldn't be easily phased by anything.  That C.C. was a capable Knightmare pilot.  How could she be so traumatized by a battle?

So much was going on, it seemed, that Kallen didn't understand.

C.C stirred when she heard Kallen approaching, and she opened her eyes with a trace of confusion, as if surprised that it was already morning. When she saw Kallen, she curled back against the couch.

"Um," Kallen said, unsure of how to deal with the girl, "I need to talk to Lelouch. Do you know where he is?"

C.C. lowered her eyelashes shyly. "Master Lelouch was here when I went to sleep. I don't know…"

"What do you mean, _here_?  With _you_?" C.C. pressed both her hands against her mouth and whimpered, as if Kallen had struck her. Kallen, for all of her Lelouch-directed anger, was utterly taken aback by the reaction. So this was how the battle had affected C.C.? It was so strange…

"That's quite enough, Kallen," Lelouch said, entering the room with his mask under his arm. His face was blank, and Kallen could tell that he was not amused. She bit her lip, then crossed her arms. Well, who Lelouch slept with—or didn't sleep with—wasn't her business. She was captain of his security forces, and that was what she'd come to see him about. She'd let herself get off-topic. It was unprofessional.

"I need to talk to you, Lelouch," she said, in a tone she'd never dare to use with Zero. "_Alone_."

Lelouch gave C.C. a barely imperceptible nod, and she made herself scarce, scurrying into one of the adjacent rooms. He looked at Kallen, then, and motioned for her to sit down. She didn't. Her anger flared again, and her right hand twitched—she remembered the two occasions on which she'd slapped him, and itched to do it again, almost hoping he'd give her a reason.

"Well?" he asked.

Kallen paused for a moment, then said, "How dare you stage an assassination attempt without notifying me?"

He blinked, looking almost confused. She knew better. "_Staging_? Was that what you thought it was?"

"I don't see what else it could have been," she replied, pointedly. "You were shot; you did not die. You didn't seem phased by the attack at all, and Jeremiah, apparently, was in on it. What I'm wondering—" She took a step closer, to glare at him better. "Is why you didn't tell _me_."

She waited, and he said nothing, so she continued. "I'm the captain of your security forces, Lelouch. You should trust me more than…than Jeremiah, than _Orange_, that Britannian who switched loyalties like it meant nothing to him."

"Jeremiah is completely loyal," Lelouch proclaimed. Even though he was unmasked, he carried himself as if he was Zero, right then, addressing thousands, instead of just Lelouch, speaking with her. "He's tied to my mother's family, and I trust him as much as I trust you."

"Hmph."  Oh yes, _that_ meant a lot right then.

He lowered his voice. "I swear to you, Kallen, I did not know that that man was going to be at the press conference, and I did not arrange for him to shoot me. The attack was genuine."

"But…" This confused her. She reached out, touching the front of his costume, just where he'd been shot the previous day. "I saw the blood. You _were_ shot."

"Yes, Kallen. I was shot."

"I don't understand."

"I know. It's…" He paused, his expression distant. "It's entirely too complicated. Just trust me, Kallen. I would never conceal anything from you that would harm you. You _do_ trust me," he added. "Don't you?"

That wasn't fair; he already knew her response.  The rational part of her brain was screaming that that wasn't any kind of an answer, that was emotional manipulation, but she said, "You remembered to rescue me during the battle for Tokyo. And you've done so much for Japan, Lelouch…I owe you my trust." She searched his eyes, softening a little. It was funny; she trusted Zero to the end of the world, but Lelouch was something of a different matter entirely.

"But don't think that you'll avoid giving me an answer," she added dryly, a rush of her new feeling washing over her to fill where her anger had been.

"I know better than that."

He seemed like he was going to say something else, but stopped, his lips slightly parted, and she realized that they were far too close for comfort. Her hand was still pressed against his chest, and he seemed very warm. Maybe it was just the proximity. Her head spun a little bit, and she was annoyed at herself. This wasn't right. She was angry, dammit. Lelouch seemed a little confused, a little amused, and still, somehow, smug, and she wanted to get that look out of his eyes. Her brain—not in its finest form—was telling her that there was only one way to do that, so she leaned closer.

"I have a press conference scheduled," Lelouch said softly. "Is there anything else you needed?"

"I…no," she said, leaning away, regret tinting her voice. With a twinge of envy she thought of C.C. Did Lelouch avoid her advances? No, that was a ridiculous comparison. C.C. was a quivering blob of jelly, and she…she was the finest of Zero's knights.

Lelouch took a step towards the door, then paused.  After a second, he motioned her to follow him. "Come with me, Kallen," he said, donning his mask. "The conference is in an hour on the _Ikaruga._  You won't just be there for security reasons."

She blinked.  "What do you mean?"

"Something I should have done long ago."  The door hissed open.  "You've always known you were my finest knight, and now the world will know.  It's time that I introduce you as my Knight of Zero."

--

Anya barely recognized the halls of the _Ikaruga_. They all looked the same to her, with all their blank walls and sliding doors. How anyone managed to find their way around this ship on a daily basis she'd never know. She took pictures of anything memorable—pictures, signs, potted plants—and stored them in her diary, just in case they had any trouble getting out.

They probably wouldn't have any trouble getting out, though. After all, they hadn't had trouble getting in. She and Gino, wearing coats over their Knight of Rounds uniforms, slipped in among the crowd of reporters, then, before anyone had noticed, slipped away again and broke through one of the doors (Gino, actually, had been the one to do the breaking; he was good at that sort of thing). Apparently, security wasn't as tight now that the war was over, despite yesterday's failed assassination of the 99th Emperor of Britannia, Zero. Somehow, she thought the Black Knights would have learned something.

No matter. She and Gino were in, now, and they were going to rescue Suzaku. Then they were going to get out. All the while, Zero would be holding a press conference on the deck. The ultimate affront. Long live Britannia, and all that. Anya didn't care terribly much for political idealism, even though she knew Gino did. It would be nice to see Suzaku again, was all, and then the three of them could disappear to the EU or some such thing.

_But while we're in here, we might as well…_

Anya stopped and glanced over her shoulder. There it was again, that voice. She'd heard it before when she was last here, but there was no one there but Gino, no one who could have spoken to her. Just her imagination, then. She wondered, rather off-handedly, if it had anything to do with the strange discrepancies in her memory.  But no, that was ridiculous.  A non sequitur.

"What is it?" Gino asked, furrowing his brow and stopping as well. "Do you hear something?"

"Nothing," she replied, deciding to shrug it off. She blinked.  Her surroundings seemed suddenly unfamiliar.

He walked up beside her. "Do you remember where weare?" he asked, sounding genuinely concerned. Well, he had a right to be. How would two former Knights of Rounds explain wandering around in the basement of the Black Knights' flagship in their old Britannian uniforms?

"Yes…I think." When she wasn't thinking about it, it was easy. Her feet seemed to be governing themselves. She closed her eyes and tried to visualize their route, sinking down, her cotton candy hair flattening between the wall and the back of her head. She thought. And—

_Here, Anya._

Her eyes snapped open.

"Go around the next corner—a left," she said, feeling suddenly very sure. "Then a right. There should be a hallway with doors on each side, and he's the sixth one on the right." Gino stared, incredulous, and she wondered, vaguely, why. "You go ahead," she added. "I'll be right behind you. I'm tired."

He raised an eyebrow, then, regaining his composure, nodded, his blue eyes cloudy and serious once again. Once he was a few paces ahead, she pressed herself up off the floor and followed.

_Thank you,_ she thought, unsure if the voice could hear her or if she was simply insane.

_Oh, don't thank me_, the voice responded. It was playful, and unquestionably female. An image flashed by in Anya's mind: thick dark hair, sparkling violet eyes.  She couldn't be making this up, could she? _Just do me one small favor_.

_What?_

_The boy you came in with_, the voice said. _He helped you in. You don't need him anymore. Shoot him, then go find Lelouch. Or, better yet, C.C._

Anya's pace didn't change, but she felt something inside of her, a kind of fear. Unusual, since she was usually so apathetic and, as far as she knew, she was talking to herself.  And what was this about Lelouch, and who was C.C.?  That witch, wasn't it, who was helping Zero?

_No,_ she thought.

_Oh, come on now, you don't have to kill him. Just slow him down. He'll only get in the way later._

Anya's right fingers twitched, and she began to reach to her belt for her gun. She grabbed her right wrist and thought, _No, I can't do that._

She thought she heard a sigh. _You are a stubborn little girl_, _Anya,_ said the voice. _Who would have guessed? Ah, well. It would have been easier for you to just obey me, but I suppose I have no choice but to_—

"Ah!" Anya gasped, this time out loud. Her vision swam purple and yellow and pink and orange and…she couldn't keep track. Dizzy, she fell to her knees. Her hand began to move again, for her gun, and she couldn't hold herself back…_No!_ she thought again, but it wasn't any use. Her left fingers trembled on her wrist. She closed her eyes and willed as hard as she could.

"Anya!"

She opened her eyes to see Gino running back for her. His face flashed different colors—purple blue green—until it settled back to normal. Anya blinked and let go of her right wrist. What had just happened?

"Are you okay?"

"That's what I'd like to know," Anya muttered, almost inaudibly. Gino grabbed her arm and pulled her up, and she looked down at herself. Nothing outwardly had changed. The entire exchange couldn't have taken more than a few seconds. What was wrong with her?

"We should get Suzaku and go," she said, glancing over her shoulders. She pulled her blog out of her pocket to make a quick note to herself as she added, to Gino's bewilderment, "I don't think being in here is good for me."

--

_A/N: No, Anya, no.  I don't think it is.  You can see that Marianne's Geass is a little different in this story already.  Or maybe we just never heard these conversations? -ponders-_

_Anyway, well, hi!  Long time no talk!  I guess I got a little unmotivated by those last few episodes of R2?  Loved the endign, but, man, it's so wierd to write this story after the series is over.  Sorry to make you guys wait so long.  I can't believe how badly I've been neglecting this story. (Speaking of neglect, though: _Friendly Fire_.  Man...)_

_And we have _another_ setup chapter.  Stuff will happen next time, promise!  Anyway, thank you **GoGothGirl, Tsuki no Akebono, SlippingSanity, WithABunny, xxlostdreamerxz, Himig, AznAnimeChick, Candelabra, GreyeFochs, imaxgoxgnomgnomxonxya, FlareKnight, Raigon, **and **Suruma** (whew!) for your reviews, you guys are awesome._

_I'm having a hard time writing lately (leads in plays are excellent to have except for when they zap your time) but I'll try to update as soon as I can.  I've been wanting to write this next scene for a long, long time..._

_Next up: we are REALLY breakin' out Suzaku!  But maybe not, if Lelouch has any say in it.  Or his devious scheming mother..._

_See you then,_

_D_

_Poll is closed!  Results:_

_1) Lelouch/Suzaku (go read my other story _Mosaic_ if you voted for this -end shameless self promotion-)_

_2) Lelouch/C.C._

_3) Lelouch/Kallen_

_4) C.C./Pizza Hut_

_Thanks for your votes! _


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